merry christmas and happy new year!!!

Its been weeks since i last blogged. I've been really really busy and tired recently. Busy with work and work and work...
My reservist is great! Its been raining and raining and we only did a pool dive, a sea dive which jerome hit 50 bars b4 we can even reach our destination, thus having to abort dive after about 50 plus minutes, and a virtual dive- dry dive with 02 circulating in our body, while we are sitting down, due to the foul weather.

There'd been 2 gatherings this month. One being the primary school gathering and the other being the secondary school one.

the primary school gathering was held in a bungalow in some ulu place in pasir ris, and we had a decent turnout of around 15.. Had a good chat, laugh and talking about the past.. Algene being the only person to come to our gathering first time since leaving our ala mata. Was great to see 2 of my best buddies that i am blessed with, bringing their gf along. They seemed stable enough to last long and i feel really really happy and touched for them. Thou i would love to have a gf too. haha... But the scar of the last one seems to have been little too deep for me.

This has been the case which i recently realised. Of course being a guy, my wound started healing, my heart started pounding faster when i saw someone whom i facied and think may be a girl whom i hope can last. but the thought of the process of efforts, money and time being invested in and in the end, getting a word, sorry.... is proving a little too much for me to having the determination to pursue the ideal relationship i wanted to.

Okie, lets get back to my gathering beore i continue.. hee... i had a bbq with my best pals at khatib reservoir on christmas eve. Again, i feel so happy for qf, my best pal whom i think i can never live without with. He's a guy whom i think i can share my woes with, a friend whom i had gone thru the ups and sowns in my life, of course taking into consideration my other great pal, zx. I was so happy to see the happiness he had with his gf. Lets hope that he would have a lasting and good relationship.

today, a gathering with my sec sch mates at marche in vivo was great. thereafter, i had my first time to ai qin hai in marina square with them. the atmosphere there was so great that my heart goes along with the sentimental songs that the singers sing. It would be a great venue for couples to spend a nite at.

Recently, i met some great gals. However, they are either too young or not in the same frequency as me. The toll of working a week of full shift in tampines, from 10 am to 1am or 2 am is taking my energy level down too. In vivo, i saw a gal who is only 16, but she possess the look of ou xuan, if not prettier, the kind of look i'd been looking for, her character is also so attractive. However, being just 16 and a little too materialistics, make me realise that well, i can only hope that i am 18 this year. haha...

while working in tampines, i messaged pf, asking her for a meal as i am near the place she worked. i received no reply, neither did a message of wishing her merry christmas.

the question: Am i really that bad a friend? i treat people with sincerity, but sometimes they just do not get any returns. I feel so unwanted by friends sometimes. True, as my cousin once told me that maybe i had been the center of attraction since young, the feeling of being left out now is something i have to adapt. Sometimes, i just wish to leave this place to go to another place, be it study or work. And i hope that this day will come soon. Just like another of my best pal, Danwin...

Merry belated Christmas and Happy 2008 new year!!! (may santa give me a gift of happiness next year, letting me leaving the unhappy memories of 2007 behind)

Charm: Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes!!!

Back in the service after 9 months

So... the long waited reservist has finally arrvived and i'm now into the 5th day of that. Think this batch of reservist which comprises of just my batch alone is the most cok up. Only 10 of us!!!! lets see... 5 fit guys for diving, 1 medic diver, my buddy, who cannot dive coz he has not learned a thing or two abt cbc, 1 permernently unfit, who's going to be down graded soon and 3 temporary unfit for diving.. lol... and the best part? cbc needs a minimum of 8 divers to operate!! what to do?? msg poh got 3 guys from 26th batch to be involved in the diving.

The weather has been really good to us. Its been a raining season, however, not whole day but after we had proto up our sets.. the whole week has been just admin, wait, proto up, pool dive, wait, rain, wait, swim, trying to get a tan from the foul weather, book out.. lol... no night dives!!

It been a long time since i ran 2.4km, the last time being 2 months ago before my exams and before i injured myself. so, today, surprisingly i passed the 4 stations: pull up, sit up, standing board jump and shuttle run without much effort. With only the 2.4km, which i need to clock 9.14min to get a diver's gold for the $400, i ran my heart, body, shit out. 2 months of no training is really an obstacle for me not to get gold. by the second round, i'm out of stamina, i cannot run as fast as i can... in the end, i clocked 10.14min. an excess of 1 min!!! Just a case of so near yet so far..

Ashley brought along his 1A curry puffs today for all of us. There's a lot of flavor to the curry puffs. That really surprises me. There are the sardines, curry, black pepper, corn, yam, durian... YES!!! durian!!! Its really delicious..

The sun was so strong this morning and afternoon. Together with Qing Yang and QQ, we laid ourselves under the sun to bake for an hour and a half. Now, my whole face looks like the butt of a monkey!! so red... pain... dry...

Anyway, i received my results. I'm somehow dissapointed with the outcome. But i will strive harder for the next semester, cutting down the no of days that i will be working and increasing the amt of time i will be spending on the studies. I don't want to feel so dissappointed again. Hmm... i did not fail any of my modules by the way.. =p

Next wed, i will be ord-ing for the second time. 5 more cycles to go before ROD!!! Think its better to do the reservist now than later. Do it while we are fit, and finish the cycles fast so it won't disrupt my future career..

=)

Charm: Winners will be hungry for more. Losers? they succumb to pressure.

The transformation

Its been about 1 and a half week since my exams. I am starting to work again, working in the CBD area promoting a new fragrance from Aigner: Men2. It seems that the stuffs i had learned in school: Marketing, are getting useful in this occasion. The 4Ps which i deemed useless when studying seems so true now. The product is very good, the location is good but not the place we set up. Just trying to save that $3k for a cheaper location which is near to the one we did our promotion in june where there are more traffic flow, we lost lots of sales! A street directory blocking our view, the banner on top of us shows a very very big Bvlgari fragrance banner, all the shops on that stretch have not opened for the past few days and its near to the smoking area of the people working around there. The price isn't good, unlike the other time where there are special offers. So are the prmotion, so not innovative, using the same promotion tactic over and over again, getting not handsome models to give out leaflets for free vials, and the free gifts don't look attractive at all.. I'm so dissapointed by the launch of this fragrance. Felt that its not attracting enough attention.

Well, next! I was so tired just now that i just laid on the sofa while watching the tv shows. Then this question came from the actress of the HK drama that set me thinking.

In the drama, she was 2 timed and just broke up with her bf, whom she saw with another girl. So in her house, she was drinking with her friend, when she asked: " Where have all the good guys gone?" This just somehow set me thinking... All guys are good when they were young. Some probably mixed the bad company. This left us with lesser good guys. Then this lesser good guys slowly became bad guy when they were into countless heartbreaking relationships. Well, i'm not saying all guys are like that. But i just felt that when one falls deeply in love into a relationship and got hurt in the process, then proceed to another and got hurt again, and so on and so forth. There will come a time when he will decide... thats it! i will not take relationship seriously... Hmmm... perhaps thats how some guys become a player in relationships..

Currently, i'm so into the Korean drama, Zhu Meng!! lol... watch it!! its a very good show. I love the fightings and the love stories in it. The lady is so pretty and attractive... watch out for her... Zhao Xi Nu.

Charm: Everyone in your life can be your best friend, but the ones that stick with you through the tough times are true friends.

Death Awaits The Unprepared

omg.. in 6 hrs time, i'm leaving my house for school.. the last paper which i have been yearning for. However, now, i wish, hope that the last paper, marketing, will be postponed. I just cannot finish all the stuffs, needless to say, the past year papers.

2 pages of answers expected for a questions, thats really lots. haha... one of the question goes like this: what are the fundamentals between selling and marketing? haha.. how to write 2 pages? omg..

the last 2 papers are well prepared for, i think but i am totally not confident with the marketing after looking at the past year paper... please pray for me, i do not need all the best, nothing from me now to give the best. haha... maybe a good luck will do..

Charm: Winners are Ordinary people with Extrodinary Enthusiasm and Spirit to WIN!

A day kept in my closet

i shall dedicate this blog to someone who's special to me..
today... 30th Oct, is suppose to be a special day to me. A day when 2 years ago, i found my happiness. Her name? lets call her PIG...
2 years ago, i got this name: Nerd and her? PIG.. Not that she's fat, but dunno somehow, this name just came out... for me? coz i look nerdy at that point of time i think.
We were together for one and a half years. She sings very well but she doesn't have confidence in herself. She's always there for her mum..
I thought i will not find someone that can capture my heart again after LS. But Pig did. It seems that every outing of ours seem to be fun and laughters. Non stop laughters. She accompanied me throughout my NS life.
We had lots of romantic moments and even signals of our own. haha... she's such a joy to be with...
Places become meaningful to us... suntec, marina square, vivo, fun fest, changi airport, etc...
suppers, looking for gd and nice food seems like a routine to us....
The future i love to look to. the 2nd year anniversary gift is also being prepared early.

However, thou the gift is prepared i can't give her. may isn't a gd month. Neither is 2007.

Now holding and keeping the gift. a memoire that i will keep, the experience and moments that i will keep, the pictures and her lovely voice i will keep. All in my little closet which beat every single second.

Cheers!

Charm: Pain is weakness leaving the body.

socialable = playboy?

Hmmm... wonder why that people always perceive me as playboy when i think i am not. Neither am i a flirt. Maybe its my character that people think i am one. Hmmm.... well... i think i am a traditional guy who values sentiment and relationship.
Had been attracting the wrong people recently thou. lol... malays, japanese, other races.. (not trying to be racist), gays... haha... i look gay.... lol... to some people... haha.. i am not!! lol... i am myself!
Went for a haircut at Bugis Chapter 2 today.. Talk rubbish with my hair stylist, Jess, again... lol... always talk cock when i went there... lol... OKie... back to my hair, i just tell her... i'll be ur guine pig. cut what hair style u want and the outcome? rather satisfied with the new hair style.. haha... with a fish bone cut on my right side.. haha...
i'm mad, insane, retarded?

Charm: The secret of persuasion is to induce the person to persuade himself.

Past Tense = Present Tense?

Exams are coming starting from this thurs, but i've been working for the past few days. With 13 chapters to go, i only studied 5. haha...
I went to Teck Ghee CC with the intention to study, and i did, taking breaks in between chapters. I strolled around the little 'town', something which i'd been doing so since my days in secondary school( Same as now, study at the study room, which has an extremely good environment). Part of the CC is undergoing renovation but the rest are still intact. Memories of the past just keep flowing back, thou i had put them all behind. From the days LS and me to the days when i am in Poly. These are the memories that are just intact with me, hiding in a corner of my memories. The Hermes launch uniform she wore, the Ang Mo supermarket, the arket where i used to hang out often in secondary schools with my buddies, Shirdeen and Daryl, the basketball court where i used to play on whenever i study there...
After the study, i took a walk along the stretch of route which i used to frequent in the past. The feelings are strong, the place so familiar but the environment has changed. This has made me to wonder: Time really passes just like a finger snap. What happens a few years back are just like yesterday.
Anyway, i bought a table from IKEA sometime in june this year, but there are creacks on the top and the stand!! omg... its not cheap... i was so angry i called to complained on tuesday and they said they will get back to me soon! Today??? Its sunday!!! and no news from them... What an international store for furnitures!!

Wish me luck for my exams!!!

Charm: Pain is weakness leaving the body.

Action = Thinking = End Result

Recalling a time when Atlas held the sky and Neptune ruled the seas; All boats rise on rippling shoulders of the human tide.

I saw this sentence while reading my monthly megazine( I forgot which one thou). Some may not understand what this sentence means but it do mean a lot to me and those who have gone thru the gruelling course in my 2 years of National Service. The thought of long stretch of boats, 17 to be exact, of 100 over tough men, with 6 to 8 in each team and the boat on the top of their head, just motivates me sometimes when i think i just cannot tolerate the tough times.

Its been just lots of downs this year, from relationship to work to studies. I received my grades for my tests. its been a horror to me. I aimed for high distinctions at the start of the course but what i got instead are credits and a fail!! Its been hard for me to swallow the fail! Thou i felt its a mistake that the markers made, and i sent an appeal letter to recheck the paper, what i got back instead is the decision is final. I think i have no choice but to accept the factl.

Work has been very bad recently. Ever since i did the promotion at Hereen, my sales has been dipping, and they are diping sharply! From more than 2k a month to less than 1k. What a vast difference. Maybe the burnden of having to work is starting to take a toll on me studies. The Fact that i have to work 4 days in the last month to 3 days now seems a little more comfortable but i think maybe 2 days a week will be good. What goes up will also result in what goes down. Hmmm... Econs put to good use? lol..

Had a bad day today. I was expecting very good sales from this Prada launch. But it seems that the new RME is still new, thou she worked in Bioterm before. Everywhere is good but the place she placed me sucks to the core. YES!! there's traffic flow, but the place i am in just have a stand that is so small that i think there's no use of putting a manpower there. And to think that she put someone like me there and a new gal at the counter?? Well... i'm more like a guy employed to give blotter cards and be an info counter to tell pp where the lift is and where the toilet is than to do what i am good at: Talk and do sales! Good thing the last 30 mins, Carmen pulled me out to the promotion area and at least i did at least sold one...

Exams are nearing.. 25th of this month.. i'll make up for what's lost in the tests. No more fail for me! I will get distinctions at least... We'll see....

Charm: Life is drawings without erasers.
I don't jump HIGH, i FLY low!

Wishing, Hoping, Waiting

well... a dull, stressful week for me. Addicted to game again. This time, its heroes of might and magic 5. Maybe thats a gd thing. It takes me off my mind for that few hours every day. Not thinking of those troubles.
Was walking in takashimaya when i decided to go for a round in the atium where there is a mook cake fare. Lots of moon cakes. So i decided to try around the stalls, when i suddenly decide to get a D24 durian snow skin moon cake from Home's favorite. The moon cake was fabulous. Definitely worth the Money. But, its not for me. Just thought of getting it for a very good friend of mine. I won't spend that kind of money on me.. lol..
Recently, for the past 2 months, my sales had dipped alarmingly to 1 bill a day. Therefore, my pay is affected too.. Was glad that during the weekend recently, i had some gd decent luck to get more.. hee...
i think i believe in others too easily. Maybe, it can be said as both good and bad. haiz... really dunno what to do... guess thats just me...

Charm: Life is a choice. Success is not an accident!

Definition

Last night, i came to know about the definition of a phrase. 'What The F**k'.. Well... i shall not reveal how i come across this with my own meaning but somehow, after discussion with my very very good soul mate, we came out with the definition.

So.. WTF: Speechless; Clueless; Upset; Disappointed; Tu Lan...

With special thanks to Chloe who had kept me spiritually accomapanied, comforting me.. hehe...

Okie... so.. my tests this week.. econs is disastrious, knowing that i wrote all my answers on the answer paper, i cannot submit. but i still have 35mins. so while waiting, i double checked all my answers. Dunno why my hands are so itchy, i went on to change about 5 of them, only to find out later after the test that they are the correct answer. Worse still, this test is 30% of the mudule..

Tml will be my Accounting test.. Have not yet started my studying coz just found out today that the book i boorowed from my friend was not the one!! so, i have to make my way to school to but a new book, costing $50.85!!! wa lau... and i'm going to use this book for only 2 more months!! what a waste of money...

Its glad to know that people around u, thou, have not contacted for so long, still care for u. =)

Charm: Found this on an advertisement... rather relevant...
Its not about picking hair after bath. Its about not having them anymore. Dun live to regret.

Birthday 2007

this year 24 yrs old le... getting older.. feel that life is no longer as energetic and lively as before.

For my birthday this year, it seems that its the same as how the year has gone... lousy, disappointing. I missed my birthday last year, having PF celebrating for me, giving me surprises. I missed being romantic.. So what if there is someone who erm... is with you, even thou she's not ur gf... haha... its just as disapppointing. Cannot even make time for me.. Even my best friends cannot meet up with me this sunday for a meal.. and some more, i told them last month and they said confirm...

So, i spend my day studying in the morning, followed by project discussion.. oh ya... a million thanks to Jie Hua and Jerome. They bought me a slice of cake and a bottle of 7Up.. So nice of them even thou we dun noe each other well enough. Thereafter, met Andy and leon, spending and slacking my time with them.. and... even they forgot my birthday!!!

on thursday, went for my work and had lunch alone... however, there's this lovely gal, Chloe, who made my day... she met me after my work.. its been a while since we met up.. she brought me to a place.. so romantic.. haha... like i say, i'd not been romentic for so long... and she gave me my present!!! a cake baked by her... for a moment, i was really touched.. its been sometime since i felt the feminine side of a gal... i lost faith in them for months.. i was depressed.. but the world just light up for that 3 or 4 hours... a million and million thanks to her..

We just sat there and talk but its not like b4... it seems i'd been duller.. not so crappy.. i wanna to... Chloe agreed. she said i had matured... haha... did I?

Sometimes, i really missed those days when i was crappy... i can just be happy go lucky kind.. but it seems the events this year somehow changed me.. some people says i'm geeting to the feminine side... i dunno..

I Am DEPRESSED!!! Life is such a troublesome one... why cant a person be happy and not sad?

Charm: A happy go lucky guy may seems happy on the exterior but he may have more troubles than any other guy on the street.

Update..

okie... 3 more months to my reservist. Ijust went for medical checkup last thursday. The route to the camp, the walking, is just so familiar.. maybe i missed the feeling of those NS days. Well, for the medical checkup, its the fist time ever that i passed the 'blowjob', first time ever to get the force above 80(mine is 84!)... lol... where in the past, my highest is at 78. haha.... the needles again is my most feared tool there... and... my eye sight has detoriated again from 6/6 to 6/9.. haiz...

Just got back from Ipoh this morning. The bus ride back to Singapore was fantastic! the Grassland coach was just so superb, no complains... the only one being no stopping for us to pee... and its the first time ever i had such a full bladder of urine in me... maybe more than 100%? haha.. i even attepted to release the urine into the bottle of water they gave me.. only to realise that the hole was too small.. haha...

Did lots of shoppig there in Ipoh. Was in the Proton car, which was super old, that had an accident with a mazda.. and the proton car war just so durable with no big damage but the back bumper of that mazda was unlucky thou.. my friend had to pay rm300 to that indian guy..\

Well.. my feeling for now is that i feel so cheated, not by the ipoh trip.. but something else.. haiz... i hate people who lies... so moody the whole day... feel like having a game of freedom(basketball) but andy is sick... so i slept almost the whole day... only to be constantly woken up by a phone call from a company called 'ya tai' something.. saying that i won the 2nd prize in their lucky draw in their exhition recently. the amt? 200k.. haha... was so happy at first only to realise later that i have to pay 1800 for admin in advance... there are so many reports on hoax and cheating recently. and i think i will forgo that prize.. better not to take any risk...

Charm: 有时候分开不是不爱而是太爱

$ knows how to fly!!

Well... It seems that i just received my pay and within a week, 500 bucks seem to dissappear from my bank.. haiz..
my working shoes, the SAF provided no. 3 boots, seem to become a crocodile, splitting up on the left leg. I had no choice today but to buy a new shoe for myself. So, off i went to tangs level 3 to get a choe with agnes. Anyway, i'd been there to look for shoes for a no of times but none can capture my attention. However, i am just plain tired of wearing that spoiled shoe. With a heavy heart, i swiped my card on the nets machine and there goes my $121.60(Even thou there's a sales in tangs offerin 20% discount).
Been spending quite a lot on cabs recently.Oh my god... somemore its midnight!!! haiz... Guess for every good thing to come by, there must be a sacrifice...
Just went for Andrew's birthday party, forgoing the SIM's bash at power house.... The party was like a small reunion for the guys who went thru the 2 years with me in NDU. Some how, i missed those days when we were together in the camp, thou at that time, i hate the 2 years... Guess when one loses something that is close to him, then only he will learn how to treasure. Okie.. back to the party... It was a fun one thou.. with Andrew singing(he's a great singer) and Clearence playing the piano. Then the dunking of pp into the pool and residents complaining... well.. it seems that we couldn't care any lesser.. haha
Recently, i'm starting to miss her more... missed those wonderful days... Maybe, like what Debbie says, i am indecisive, at times a little too gu niang, with my answers always in between yes and no...
I told myself that i will change. Change to be a more decisive person. To be what i used to be.. A more confident guy. Just give me more time....

Charm: Tough time don't LAST. TOUGH MAN DO!!!

hurt

well...
why is it that one can hurt the other and not the other way round?

Sometimes, one doesn't know that he/she has hurt the other guy with what he/she said... but when its the other way round, they would just tell u straight off...
sometimes, i just don't mean to hurt a person with what i say, with me trying to console and care... but to them, its just hurt... but they just keep on hurting u and u just cannot retaliate back as they are ur love ones...

For so much effort had been put in, the efforts are just like being wasted... people i had loved can just dismissed whatever efforts put in with a word or two... Sometimes i just feel that if in a relationship, no effort is being put in and it can work out, how wonderful it will be. And it cannot be also just a one sided effort with the other party expecting the guy to give in to all.
Afterall, there is a limit to even the most patient man in the world. i will put it as a balloon. if u keep blowing air into a balloon and the amt of air coming out is not fast enough (input of air is more the output), the balloon will explode. So, for all the people out there... pls be more considerate....

Life's getting more and more difficult. Money is an issue, studies are also one and work!!! its difficult to balance all these 3 in 24 hours unless one forgo his sleep. In the perfect ideal world, just study and have money will be the best situation. But i am not like any rich guy out there where i can but a cosmetics, take cab everyday, buying meals all the time. I dun have a rich family but a modest one. My bank is not a money tree where they grow like $1000 interest a day. they will deplete too...

How i wish i can be in a life just like in poly or secondary school where i can just enjoy an hour or 2 of a basketball game, have plenty of time on projects and studies and be as friendly liek what i used to be..

Life has definitely change as one gets older and living on the edge whereby he's nearing the career era....

WL - The most beautiful history of a person is not only the pictures that one has but the vivid playback of memories that one has gone thru, for no other tools or things will have as much emotions as the latter can give.

First Blog

well...
i am well into my first blog...
School has started for me for 2 weeks and i am starting to feel the pressure of doing well for my relevant subjects.. i've 3 modules in total, 3 hours, 3 days a week... and it cost a bomb for each lecture!!! roughly abt 200 bucks for each!!!
i'm going to tire myself out too... with me having to work when not studying... tts practically no rest days... i wanna study on my off day but i am just too tired. really dun wanna work and enjoy my life but who will support me?? no one except myself!!
Been like a third party for some time... feel so lousy for the past 1 month past pr so... haiz... sometimes, i just hate to be a guy... so troublesome... haha....
erm... thats all for my first blog...

WL : The secret to persuasion is to induce the person to persuade himself